Forgetting Words During Perimenopause: What Helps

You're in the middle of a sentence, explaining something you know well, and the word you need simply isn't there. You can picture it. You could describe it. You know exactly what it means. But you can't get it out. So you say "the thing", laugh it off, and quietly wonder what's going on.

If this has started happening more often in your 40s or early 50s, you're far from alone. Difficulty finding words is one of the memory changes women often report around the menopause transition. This article explains what's known about why word-finding can feel harder, what else tends to make it worse, and practical ways to handle it in conversations and at work.

Quick action summary: Trouble finding familiar words can become more noticeable around perimenopause, especially with poor sleep, stress or fatigue, but it is not proof of a hormonal cause. Pause, describe the word you mean and use notes when helpful. Ask a healthcare professional about persistent, worsening or disruptive changes. Sudden speech difficulties, facial drooping or arm weakness need emergency assessment.

What word-finding difficulty can feel like

Many women describe some version of "I know the word, but I can't reach it." It might look like:

A word sitting on the tip of your tongue, sometimes with its first letter or rough sound but not the word itself
Blanking on a name you know well — a colleague, a neighbor, a TV show
Reaching for one word and saying a different, related one
Losing your train of thought partway through a sentence
Finding that words come more slowly when you're tired, rushed or put on the spot

These moments happen to everyone from time to time. What many women notice in perimenopause is that they seem to happen more often, or at worse moments.

Is it common around the menopause transition?

Yes. Trouble recalling words is among the cognitive complaints described by women going through the menopause transition, and research has taken these reports seriously.

Long-term studies that tested women's memory before, during and after the transition have found measurable changes. The most consistent are in verbal learning and memory — taking in words and information, and recalling them later. In most women, test scores stay within the normal range, even when the changes feel frustrating in daily life.

In the Study of Women's Health Across the Nation (SWAN), women didn't improve on repeat learning tests during perimenopause the way they did before and after it. After menopause, learning returned to premenopausal levels for many. That suggests these changes may be time-limited for many women, though not necessarily for everyone.

What may contribute to word-finding difficulty

What research has established

Subjective memory complaints during menopause are supported by research showing measurable changes in aspects of verbal memory.
Poor sleep affects memory. Sleep-deprivation studies show it makes learning and recalling verbal information harder.
Hot flashes, poor sleep and low mood are each linked to memory difficulties in midlife women.

What's plausible

Hormonal change may contribute. Estrogen receptors are present in brain areas involved in memory and language. It is reasonable to think hormonal changes may play some part, but the link to everyday word-finding has not been directly proven.
Several factors probably add up. Hormonal change, broken sleep, stress and a heavy mental load often arrive in the same years, and together they can make retrieval feel slower.

What's still uncertain

How much each factor contributes for any one woman. An article can't tell you what's behind your own word-finding difficulty.
Whether treatments aimed at hormones improve word-finding. Hormone therapy is not recommended as a treatment for cognitive concerns. It can treat hot flashes and night sweats, which can disrupt sleep, but that is a separate conversation to have with your clinician.

What tends to make word-finding worse

Poor sleep. After a run of broken nights, retrieval can feel slower. If sleep has become a struggle, see our guide to menopause sleep problems and what helps.

Stress and anxiety. Many women find that the harder they chase a word, the further away it feels. Pressure can make retrieval harder at exactly the moment you need your attention free.

Multitasking and mental load. Holding a thought in mind while doing something else relies on working memory. Our article on why multitasking feels harder during menopause explores this in more detail.

Fatigue. For some people, word-finding feels easier when they are rested and harder when fatigued.

Why names can be especially frustrating

Names can be particularly difficult to retrieve because they are arbitrary labels with fewer meaningful associations to help prompt recall. That is true at any age, and it can feel more noticeable when sleep, stress or hormonal change are also in the mix.

Practical ways to cope with missing words

None of these strategies treat a cause. They're low-risk ways to reduce frustration and keep conversations flowing.

In conversation

Pause rather than force it.
Talk around it. Use a synonym or describe what you mean and keep going.
Give yourself retrieval time.
Come back to it if you lose your train of thought.

At work

Prepare key names and points before meetings.
Single-task where you can.
Use notes, reminders and templates freely.
Schedule demanding conversations for when you're freshest, if you have that flexibility.

Our article on menopause brain fog at work has more ideas for managing focus and memory on the job.

Day to day

Look after your sleep.
Reduce overload and build in short breaks.
Address hot flashes and night sweats if they're disrupting sleep. A health care professional can talk you through options.

When to speak to a healthcare professional

Word-finding difficulty is commonly reported during the menopause transition, but it isn't always due to menopause. Memory and language can be affected by many things, and only a health care professional who knows your history can help work out what's going on.

Talk to your doctor or primary care provider if changes in your memory or thinking are persistent or worsening, interfere with work or ordinary daily tasks, have been noticed by other people, go beyond occasional trouble finding words, or are causing you significant worry.

If you're wondering whether memory or thinking changes could mean something other than menopause, our guide to menopause brain fog vs dementia explains what doctors look at and when to get checked.

If this feels frightening

Losing words can feel unsettling, especially if your work or sense of self relies on being articulate. If the fear has become as hard to live with as the symptom, you may find "Am I losing my mind?" — when menopause brain fog feels terrifying helpful.

The bottom line

Trouble finding words is a frustrating and recognizable experience around the menopause transition. Research shows measurable changes in aspects of verbal memory, while hormonal change may play a part and sleep, stress, mental load and fatigue can make retrieval feel harder.

You can't always control when a word disappears. But pausing, talking around it, reducing overload and protecting your sleep can take much of the sting out of those moments. If the changes are persistent, worsening or worrying you, a conversation with a health care professional is the right next step.

If you'd like a structured way to work on focus and memory day to day, Menopause Brain Fog: The Memory & Focus Guide brings practical strategies together in one place.

Sources

Maki PM, Jaff NG. Brain fog in menopause: a health-care professional's guide for decision-making and counseling on cognition. Climacteric. 2022;25(6):570–578.
Greendale GA, et al. Effects of the menopause transition and hormone use on cognitive performance in midlife women. Neurology. 2009;72(21):1850–1857.

This article is for general education and isn't a substitute for personal medical advice.

Forgetting Words During Perimenopause: Why Word-Finding Can Feel Harder and What Helps